A birthday ode to not riding at Wingello last weekend

Tuesday, 5 April 2011

A birthday cake is crucial to a birthday party. So is setting the party date.  Way, way back in November 2010, Kate Mortensen, owner of Pinky her classy Anthem MTBO cycle, one-time NSW MTBO Champion, had set the party date – March 26, 2011. Two days before the real event – the big five oh. 50. Fifty. No matter how the number was said or written, one just can’t make the number go smaller. Maybe downsize the font! No matter…

That’s Keith Bramma’s age. Me. Born in 1961. The year Jacques Anquetil won the Tour de France. A whole 20 years before Specialized introduced the Stumpjumper, the world’s first major production mountain bike.  The first bike I rode was a single speed 26” Malvern Star.  Heavy as lead.  I was aged seven. And I was lucky because I lived on the Moree Plains!

The five oh party. Venue booked. Sport was still a focus. Barefoot bowls for Bramma’s birthday bash at the Manly Bowling Club followed by bountiful beverages, complete with Best and Fairest Awards and a specially made birthday cake.  But the date was March 26!

El Pres, Fearless Mountain Devils Leader rolled out an email on a dark scary tenth day of December 2010. Storm clouds had been brewing. Maybe there was an eclipse behind the cloud because it was dark and very ominous. Devastating news unfolded as I opened El Pres’ email “NSW MTBO events in 2011” at 4.06PM that day.  Six lines in and the news hit me like a steel crankset whacked between the legs, just on the bottom of the torso.  “26/27 March  Wingello State Forest“ in all of its bolded 13.5 points font size.

Slippy, my loving Salsa Dos 29er MTB Orienteering Bike, somehow felt the energy 10 km away. She wailed! Her rider, now nearly 50 years old, was experiencing tumultuous torture, and she wasn’t sure why. Her almost 50yo rider was wheeling in frenzy with mixed emotions as he worked out that he was going have to miss his 50th party to compete in  the Wingello South SS1.  What will the party participants think of that?  No birthday boy!

Who is the course setter I wonder?   Hah! Marcel Van Schie, Esteemed MTBO Course Torturer Extraordinaire!  Heh, heh, now I really can upset him. He will have to set the SS1 course event but he won’t be able to go to the event. After recently being my best man at my wonderful wedding, how could he not come to the party if I ask him.  Priceless! A friendship totally based on how much you can really pi** your mate off! True aussie mateship.  Perfect. With warp speed, I told Marcel about the five oh party being on March 26th with much happy enthusiasm.  Whoa, not happy Jan!. Mate, can’t you reschedule the party. No, why?!  Heh, heh. We are even better mates now. Aussie mateship can be strange at times.

Kate and the birthday cake maker had found a true theme. The sport of MTB orienteering would be portrayed. Controls would be included. Notice the Salsa ensign on the bike. 29 inch wheels too. Cool huh. Why is Keith, who is now 50 years old, not on his bike, sitting down peacefully with a wry and satisfied smile. I somehow think the cake maker has Keith celebrating a Super Series win, reflecting on his perfect navigation through totally tortuous terrain.  All on Slippy, his Salsa Dos 29er!

Keith Bramma